Yep, every week is different. New last week... Mastitis...Oh man, is this painful!! For those of you not familiar, it is a breast infection. I had been having pain for maybe a week but it wasn't accompanied with any other symptoms so I didn't think much of it. The pain increased throughout the week, and then I had chills all night last Friday and I was really dizzy. I just thought I was really tired and I swore our heater was broken! I finally took my temperature the next morning and realized that I had a fever. So we went to urgent care and got some antibiotics. I'm feeling better now. Saturday I was so ready to throw in the towel and give up on breastfeeding, but then Sunday and everyday since Claire has really gotten into a rythmn!!! Feedings aren't taking an hour anymore. I was also still a little worried that she wasn't getting enough, so Colin borrowed a meat scale from a co-worker and she weighed 9 pounds 1 ounce last weekend!!! So she has gained even more than they recommend! yay!

Claire and I have such a good routine going now. I can really tell that it makes a HUGE difference. She sleeps amazingly at night when we stick to the routine during the day and when we don't she doesn't sleep quite as well. I read this great book called "On Becoming Babwise" that was recommended to me by several people and it is great. It's all about getting your baby on a schedule and helping them get great sleep. My only advice I will ever give to new moms is for them to realize that they are the mom and they don't have to take any advice from anyone. So this isn't advice I'm just going to share what has worked for us so far! One thing the book suggests is that you do a continuous eat/wake/sleep cycle throughout the day. This makes it so baby doesn't rely on being nursed to sleep. They also suggest that you don't give them any "sleep props" and let them cry it out so that they learn to fall asleep on their own. This way if they have to fall alseep somewhere new they won't have as much trouble with it. I will say this book does have controversy around it because many people don't believe in feeding your baby on a schedule or with letting newborns cry it out, but honestly I have to say it is totally working for us. Claire really only cries about 5 minutes before she is fast asleep and most babies need to cry a little to let off some energy before they can fall asleep anyway. And with the feeding on a schedule thing, the book recommends to get in full feedings, no little snacks here and there and naturally they fall into a 2.5-3 hour schedule anyway. And it's totally flexible. It just gives mom and baby some reassurance knowing what is coming next! For the first few weeks we had Claire sleeping in our room in a bassinette, but she makes little grunts and squeaks ALL night long! I wasn't getting ANY sleep, I also noticed that she slept great in her crib during the day so I finally transferred her there for night time sleep and we are all getting lots more sleep! I think it is really important that mom and baby get good sleep...a tired, worn out mom is no good!

With Claire taking naps in her crib I have more time to do things for me...like take showers :) and bake and do some little craft projects. I figured I should really take advantage of this time as stay at home mom and do some stay-at-home-momish stuff (instead of just watching hours of daytime TV). This week I made a necklace that I saw on pinterest and I started a fall wreath to hang on our door, I still need to buy a glue gun before I can finish it.

My mother in law bought me a cookbook called "Deceptively Delicious " that has all these fun recipes that add vegetable purees to them. It's basically hiding veggies to get your kids to eat more, but I totally need this to eat my veggies too! I made applesauce muffins that have a carrot puree and chocolate chip cookies that have carrot puree and chickpea puree. Um, so good. And it really wasn't that hard to make the purees. You can make a ton and freeze small amounts so you always have some to cook/bake with. I'm totally thinking about making some of my own baby food when that time comes...or start while I'm home and freeze for when that time comes! It's something you could spend one day a month doing (on a weekend) and have a ton of baby food for super cheap!

Yesterday I had my 6 week post-partum visit and I got the go ahead to resume regular exercise. I definitely need to start slow, I don't feel 100% yet and can't imagine just jumping right back into it. I have signed up for my first post-baby run though to give me a little motivation, the Jingle Bell Run 5k on Decemeber 2nd! So I will need to start running again soon so I don't die.

It seems everyday is so different from the last. Claire has been a bit more fussy at night, she's not the brand-new-sleeps-all-the-time-baby anymore! Two nights ago was probably the worst, she woke up several times hungry and then cried (loudly) when I put her down again. I got maybe 3 hours of sleep total that night. Oh man I thought for sure she must have been sick. But then last night was the best night we've had yet! She only woke up once to be fed, giving me a couple good 4 hour streches of sleep! I so needed that rest, thank you Jesus! And she is taking a good nap right now so I can actually sneak in a little blogging :) I love that she is getting more aware of her surroundings, she sits in her swing and stares out the window...I don't even have to turn the swing on. The breastfeeding has also gotten better. On Sunday we had another lactation appointment and I left more frustrated than ever. Every time we go we end up seeing a new person even when I specifically asked this time if I could see someone we had seen before, but when arrived it was someone different. It feels like we have to start over again with the whole story and we weren't getting any progressive help. Claire actually did get enough milk at this last appointment even though it felt like a bad feed. So I decided to be done with lactation consultants for a while and just try things on my own. This week I decided to go cold turkey with her and eliminate all bottles and just breastfeed (it takes about 45-50 minutes a feeding for me to be confident that she got enough though), even if she was fussy after, I just did not give her the bottle. And seriously I think it is working, she is getting better at it everyday and not fussing and acting like she wants a bottle after. What a difference a week makes. I prayed about this whole feeding thing and the Lord really showed me that I, as Claire's mother, can make the decisions on how we do things. I don't have to do exactly what the "experts" tell me too. I gotta go with my mom intuition sometimes and do what works for us! That has brought major relief, when trying to go with all the advice the lacation consultants, pediatrition, books I was reading, etc. were giving us it made me really stressed out and not confident in what I was doing.

I don't think I ever posted any final nursery pictures so here are a few...it actually isn't totally done...the book shelf still needs work. We'll see if it ever gets done!

Claire Grace Kambak

Oh my goodness! We are so in love with our little bundle. Claire Grace was born September 17, 2012 @ 6:15pm. 7 pounds, 7 ounces. Everyone tells you how amazing it is and you just have no idea until it actually happens. Everyone also tells you how sleep deprived you will be and you really have NO idea. It's a roller coaster of emotions, but so much fun. She is changing and growing every day.

I will say that the labor was absolutely nothing like I planned it out. I started to have contractions around 11pm on Sept. 16th and timed them for a few hours before waking Colin up at 1am to let him know this was the real deal. We timed them until about 9am when we called the midewife to let her know the contractions had been coming about 4-5 minutes apart for an hour. So she told us to come in. When we got there they checked me out and I was only 3 centimeters dilated and the contractions had slowed down. So they said we could walk around for a couple hours or go home. The idea of walking around the hospital while I was having contractions did not sound fun, so we went home. This was so disapointing! As soon as we got home they really started to pick up and get bad. We were home for a few hours before heading back. At this point it was really intense. All I could do was scream through each contraction. Colin thought I was going to die. It's a little embarassing to admit that, haha, but everyone handles labor differently I guess. Prior to going into labor I really imagined myself totally calm and taking the pain as it came. I also hoped to do a water birth. I thought the water would help with the pain and make the whole thing more relaxing, but after 17 hours of labor I really just couldn't take it. I couldn't relax and I wasn't progessing (they thought it could be another 7 hours), I even labored in the water for a couple hours before opting for an epidural. I always thought I would have a "natural" birth with no drugs, but honestly I am really glad I decided to take the drugs. Immediately after I was able to relax. It was a totally different experience. The midwife let us know this could potentially slow things down, so they left us alone for a bit. Our room had a beautiful view of the city and the mountain and Colin and I could just sit and chat. About an hour later my water broke, the nurse and midwife came back in and were surprised that I was already fully dilated and ready to push. It took an hour to push little Claire out. I felt like I could fully enjoy the experience, the epidural took away the pain but I still felt the pressure to know when to push. I didn't think I would want to watch with a mirror, but I am really glad I did. It was absolutely amazing!

Claire had some mild jaundice and lost about 12% of her body weight which was more than they like to see (usually up to 10% is ok). And we found out it was because she wasn't taking in much while breastfeeding. We've had to supplement with bottles of pumped milk. This has been extra exhausting, I breastfeed her (so she'll get used to that and continue with it), then pump and then feed her a bottle. Oh man, talk about looonnng feedings. It's getting better though and I have been going to a lactation specialist twice a week to work on it. We are now trying to get her to feed more efficiently and ween her from the bottle. Who knew this could be so hard, and so emotional!! This has been one of the biggest challenges so far. All I have been doing to nursing, nursing, nursing! Getting out of the house is a challenge with feedings, but I have managed to get out at least once a day this last week. It's a tad depressing being inside all day with this amazing October weather!!

We've been surrounded by some wonderful family visits and great friends have blessed us with dinners! Colin's mom was able to make here the night Claire was born, she only got to stay for one night but her and Colin's dad came for a visit last week, along with Colin's grandparents, his Aunt Kim, Uncle Dennis and Aunt Shelley. I am so happy everyone was able to spend time with little Claire. My family (minus my sister Natalie) was able to come visit the night Claire was born as well. My sister came into town last week as well and spent a couple days with me, giving me a chance to get in a couple showers and naps! I'm surprised I even have time to write this blog right now, but Claire is learning to take a few naps in her crib. For the first few weeks nap times were spent on laps of visitors and on mommy and daddy...she's had trouble sleeping at night and I'm convinced it's because it's so quiet at night. Hopefully getting in some quiet naps will help with evening sleep. We'll see. Well that is about all for now! I will continue to post pictures and updates on her progress :)